Tag Archives: alcoholism

I’ve been feeling very suicidal (and no, I don’t want to be saved or pitied)

TRIGGER WARNING: Suicide Here I am, screaming into the void again, just like in the movie Alien.  The monsters aren’t enormous killer creatures with acid for blood, but the monsters in my head….. Before I go any further, I don’t want to … Continue reading

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I hardly get any likes, but it’s actually quite depressing that my ‘One week sober‘ blog entry is still getting likes, but I failed at my attempt to quit drinking after just 8 days.  I’m a failure, but I’m not … Continue reading

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My prison without walls or bars

I hate weekends, but I hate bank holiday weekends even more and this long weekend is proving to be a difficult one.  I’ve been struggling with depression, loneliness and restless thoughts.  I haven’t drank at all today, because I’m saving … Continue reading

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Relapse day

TRIGGER WARNING: alcoholism, self-harm Today I drank 3/4 of a bottle of vodka.  I didn’t plan on today being the day I finally gave in, bit after going out earlier and discovering that kids and teenagers were off school due … Continue reading

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One week sober

It’s now Tuesday, exactly a week since I had my last drinking spell.  A week may not seem like a long time or much of an achievement, but it’s an eternity for someone with a long history of substance abuse … Continue reading

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I’m going to try living with K (my ex) for a while after all

K and I are talking again after the ‘misunderstanding’ from a couple of weeks ago.  She said that we can still try living together for a month to see how it goes.  I’m not thrilled by the idea, mainly because … Continue reading

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Is there anybody actually out there?

Weekends are the worst and this weekend if no exception, especially as I have (for now) forced myself to stop drinking.  The loneliness is fucking unbearable, at a time when I really really need someone to talk to, even if … Continue reading

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