Tag Archives: freak

Hurt again by someone’s well-meaning words and intentions

After I deleted my OK Cupid account,, a guy who I’d given my number to expressed interest in meeting and staying in touch.  I was drunk at that point yesterday and  my guard was down and my inhibitions were low.  … Continue reading

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This ain’t worth it

I have nothing and no one to live for.  I’m not even living; I’m existing.  I derive no joy from life whatsoever and I’m already dead to the world, i.e. invisible  I see absolutely no point in carrying on and … Continue reading

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I am completely alone in all this

TRIGGER WARNING: Suicide   Why do people expect me to live a life that they themselves would be unable to live?  This includes my mother and former friends. In my very much completed suicide note, I have listed 17 legitimate … Continue reading

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Hiding from you

I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to continue hiding from you and world like this, but if and when it gets to the point that I can no longer hide, that will be the time I have … Continue reading

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Social Leper

This isn’t getting any easier and I’m just wasting what little energy I have left by trying.  I still feel as alone as I did in Rochester, but the difference is that I no longer have my therapist to pour … Continue reading

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A statistical reminder of a world that doesn’t care

Anyone who tells you that being different or weird is good is either not that different at all or they’re simply talking out of their ass, having had little or no experience of how it feels to be marginalized.  In … Continue reading

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A more difficult than usual weekend

I wasn’t going to update this thing again for a while because all I’m doing is talking to myself out loud and gone are the days when the internet was a place of solace and a place where I felt … Continue reading

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