Tag Archives: suicidal

What a waste (back from Scotland)

I got back late yesterday evening from Edinburgh, which is where I was staying since Tuesday. The whole thing was a complete waste of time and money, as I didn’t have the guts to do what I wanted to do. … Continue reading

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Utterly disappointed in myself

I have to return to Grantham later today, where I will have to face my mother at some point.  I’m very disappointed in myself, as I have not been able to do much while I’ve been away over the last … Continue reading

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I really do want to die

TRIGGER WARNING: suicide, suicidal ideation I’ve had a really bad few days, all things considered. My brain feels so scattered that I don’t know where to begin, but I honestly want to die. I’m tormented by the past and present … Continue reading

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Weekends are becoming increasingly unbearable

It’s actually harder to go out here than it was in Rochester at weekends, as much as I hate to admit that.  There seems to be a higher percentage of families with children living here and these are the last … Continue reading

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Why can’t people just leave me alone?

I made a mistake today….I went out. An abandoned railway trail in the countryside is the last place I expected to encounter more harassment, but it happened.  A group of 3-4 teenage girls had a good laugh as I cycled … Continue reading

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I don’t want people as ‘friends’ (adult friendships are expendable)

I know I sound like a broken / stuck record by saying this, but I don’t even want friends anymore. All people do is cause me pain and hurt me, even if that wasn’t their intention. People lie and trick … Continue reading

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Ugly in the Granite City

Winston Churchill often referred to his depression as a “black dog”, but I don’t think that metaphor can be used to describe my own depression, which isn’t of this world.  I’m no Winston Churchill either; he had a purpose, which … Continue reading

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