Tag Archives: triggered

I can’t live alone, but I can’t live with anyone either (apparently)

My existence has turned even more nightmarish since I returned to England at the end of last month.  Yesterday was probably the worst day I’ve had in a very long time.  To cap it all off, a ‘suicide note’ that … Continue reading

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I had another meltdown yesterday

I had another meltdown yesterday, after the pressure became too much for me to take and I was upset that K’s son had taken my bike, even though I’d mistakenly agreed to it (I suffer from delayed reaction thinking and … Continue reading

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My bike trip to Dunkeld and Pitlochry turned into a nightmare (I totally fucking lost it)

My trip to Dunkeld and Pitlochry yesterday by train and bike ended terribly and it serves as concrete proof as to why I should not go out at weekends at all, or to anywhere where there are likely to be … Continue reading

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Four (completely infeasible) alternatives to suicide

TRIGGER WARNING: Suicide, dark thoughts It’s 2 am and I can’t sleep (surprise).  I feel tired, but I have a lot of restless energy and a mind racing with intrusive thoughts.  I’m angry at the world and angrier still with … Continue reading

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I really fucking hate weekends and ‘weekend people’

Another ‘I hate weekends’ blog entry, but it’s true…I really fucking hate weekends and ‘weekend people ‘with a passion.  From Friday evening to Sunday night, it’s much harder for me to go out because the enemy (people) are everywhere.  Saturdays … Continue reading

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Extremely ugly and lonely in Glasgow

I went to Glasgow on the train from Perth yesterday (Monday)), despite feeling like shit and despite the fact that it was a bank holiday here in Scotland yesterday, so it was a weekend day.  I  wouldn’t have gone at … Continue reading

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Day one in Edinburgh (and I hate being me)

I wrote a long post about how my mother had upset me yesterday with her cynicism, but I ended up deleting it because I feel like I came across as whiny.  It’s difficult to explain the complexity of my relationship … Continue reading

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