Tag Archives: triggers

Another highly triggering encounter with my mother (family of origin)

TRIGGER WARNING: Self harm I had a truly awful day yesterday (Tuesday), which culminated in another major fight with my mother.  Once again, she managed to upset me when I went over to her house around lunchtime.  I only went … Continue reading

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I’m going to try living with K (my ex) for a while after all

K and I are talking again after the ‘misunderstanding’ from a couple of weeks ago.  She said that we can still try living together for a month to see how it goes.  I’m not thrilled by the idea, mainly because … Continue reading

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Brexit might not happen after all (but I refuse to ‘hope’)

Even though my drinking has been helping me sleep a bit, it hasn’t stopped the nightmares or the intensity of them.  I should try to get more sleep as I’m going to London for the day later to get the … Continue reading

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Fear and envy have made me hateful

I don’t find the subject of envy particularly easy to talk about, but I have no one to discuss it with and I feel no one truly understands why I feel the way that I do. It’s reached the stage … Continue reading

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The toxicity of my envy (and dysphoria too)

TRIGGER WARNING: Suicide, self-harm I have a huge problem with envy of others and I can’t control it. If it’s bad, it causes me to spiral into a depressive, self-destructive episode that can last for days. I have so many … Continue reading

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My anxiety is out of control

I’m tired of making plans and appointments, only to have to cancel every time because my anxiety gets the better of me and I find myself unable to go alone.  I was meant to go to the anxiety group in … Continue reading

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I really do want to die

TRIGGER WARNING: suicide, suicidal ideation I’ve had a really bad few days, all things considered. My brain feels so scattered that I don’t know where to begin, but I honestly want to die. I’m tormented by the past and present … Continue reading

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